Christopher Michael, gay, gay poetry

from sorrow to serenity

Kiss Me My Sweet
 
we have been gay, going our way/life has been beautiful, we have been young.
after you’ve gone, life will go on/like an old song we have sung. Romberg/ Hammerstein

1
I’ve grown too old to dream
having you to remember
grown too old to dream your love lingering in my heart
you once lived, were once young
you died long ago I don’t know when
you kissed me my sweet, we both let us part
I walked away without turning back
we had been young 1962 young
what did we know?
nothing except you did kiss me my sweet
we felt nothing, just weren’t meant to be
I left for a hospital to shock my brain out of you
you went back to your blackboards and died
that kiss still lives in my heart as a disappointment
years of hopes dreams pretend kisses
that kiss died in my heart
searched for you relentlessly entombed somewhere
I’ve never stopped mourning the first boy to take my heart

2
you wanted a blond Adonis that wasn’t me
you were the first–an ancestry of obsessions
when I grow too old to dream
I’ll always remember you the way memory remembers you
obsession of 1963
handsome lithe popular special, our
child-like nearly innocent restricted love
set me free, almost killed you
my dream, my first immortal love
kiss me my sweet but only in my dreams
so we must part
we did in that year was it summer of 1964

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