God Vows To Destroy Ireland The First Chance He Gets

we all need this laugh!

The Cretonia Times-Picayune


PEARLY GATES, HEAVEN – (CT&P) – Sources close to Almighty God told Fox News today that the benevolent creator of the universe will devastate Ireland with a series of droughts, heat waves, earthquakes, tsunamis, and a major zombie outbreak “just as soon as he has the time to do so.”

The sources, who wished to remain anonymous lest the all-loving deity seek vengeance against them, said that God intended to punish Ireland for daring to treat all her citizens equally and allowing homosexuals to get married.

“He’s really pissed off,” said on source, “and he plans on killing hundreds of thousands of Irish men, women, and children indiscriminately and then later on sort out just who voted for marriage equality.”

asteroid Sources told Fox News that gay marriage would destroy America because an all-merciful God would hurl a gigantic scrotum at the geographic center of the continental United States, killing the…

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One thought on “God Vows To Destroy Ireland The First Chance He Gets

  1. Didn’t God already try wiping Ireland out once before with the “Potato Famine”. Maybe that was his working in the past and getting it over with as he already knew that the people of Ireland would wake up, come to their senses, stop being fearful and give civil human rights to ALL their people. 🙂 Hugs


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